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XII. GOOD ACCOUNTANT.

I WAS present in the West country some twenty-five years since, when a bishop made a partage of money collected by a brief amongst such who in a village had been sufferers by a casual fire; one of whom brought in the inventory of his losses far above all belief.

Being demanded how he could make out his losses to so improbable a proportion, he alleged the burning of a pear-tree growing hard by his house, valuing the same at twenty years’ purchase, and the pears at twenty shillings per annum, presuming every one would be a bearing year; and by such windy particulars did blow up his losses to the sum by him nominated.

Some pretend in these wars to have lost more thousands than ever they were possessed of hundreds. These reckon in, not only what they had, but what they might, yea, would have had. They compute not only their possessions, but reversions, yea, their probabilities, possibilities, and impossibilities also, which they might desire, but could never hope to obtain.

The worst is, I might term many of these men anti-Mephibosheths, who, out of his loyalty to David, 2 Sam. xix. 30, Let them take all, 198said he, forasmuch as my lord the king is come home again in peace unto his own house. But these, except they may have all, and more than all, they ever possessed, care not a whit whether or no the king ever return; so unconcerned are they in his condition.

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