Chapter 2: Topical Index
First let me say I agree that the emphasis should always be on Jesus, not any other human, even his mother Mary. However I do not agree that Jesus did not consider Mary's request to have no hold on him. He was always faithful to the law of God, one of which was to honor your mother and your father. It would seem likely that there was no conflict with Gods will when he honored his mother Mary's request, rather that they were working together. I will grant that it seems unlikely that Jesus would have acted in this instance if it were not for his mothers request. We may do well to remember that when we pray.
I grant that the will of God is indeed alien to the will of the flesh but Jesus in a later passage acknowledges that the father is knowing of our fleshly needs and that generally it is within his will that those needs be met, as well as the desires of the new heart he has gifted to all his chosen.
Finally the Writer of John does not say it is Jesus first miracle, rather that it was his first sign. We read earlier of Jesus's response to Nathaniel. This was of a type of miracle often called farseeing where Jesus observed Nathaniel under the fig tree, not by natural vision, but in a supernatural way.