George Herbert: "The Church-porch"
Day 26: Morning
|Entice all neatly to what they know best;
For so thou dost thy self and him a pleasure:
(But a proud ignorance will lose his rest,
Rather then shew his cards.) Steal from his treasure
What to ask further. Doubts well rais'd do lock
The speaker to thee, and preserve thy stock.
Attract all carefully to what they know best; for so
you do yourself and him a pleasure: ([warning] but a proud ignorant person
will lose his rest rather than show his cards.) Steal from his treasure [of
information] what to ask further. Doubts well raised do lock the speaker
to you and preserve your value.
Conversation is not a battle for supremacy. Encourage a person to talk about what he/she knows. The conversation will be a pleasure for both of you. Be interested in what the other person knows, and encourage him to discuss and explain what he understands. To get along with someone, help to make him comfortable by being interested and you will learn something about the subject and the person. Listen to what is said and this will tell you what to ask further. Ask questions to improve your understanding and to establish your own point of view. You do not have to agree with everything, but ask when you do not understand. The questions confirm your interest and develop a better relationship. (Only the ignorant person who is too proud to reveal his lack of understanding will not say anything when you are interested.)
People are comfortable, at ease and friendly with what they know. They relate well to people who are interested in what they have to say and share what they know on the subject that is close to them. They do not expect you to agree with everything they say. They appreciate questions intelligently raised (particularly if they are questions that they can answer). They recognize the able listener as friendly, intelligent and respected.
For you. The Internet version of a conversation - interactive, dynamic html:
Fill-in each of the following empty fields using your own personal data and then click on "Write Story."
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