41. I come now to your Epilogue, (that is to the revilings which
you pour upon me,) in which you exhort me to repentance, and threaten
me with destruction unless I am converted, that is, unless I keep
silence under your accusations. And this scandal, you say, will recoil
upon my own head, because it is I who by replying have provoked you to
the madness of writing when you are a man of extreme gentleness and of
a meekness worthy of Moses. You declare that you are aware of crimes
which I confessed to you alone when you were my most intimate friend,
and that you will bring these before the public; that I shall be
painted in my own colours; and that I ought to remember that I am lying
at your feet, otherwise you might cut off my head with the sword of
your mouth. And, after many such things, in which you toss yourself
about like a madman, you draw yourself up and say that you wish for
peace, but still with the intimation that I am to keep quiet for the
future, that is that I am not to write against the heretics, nor to
answer any accusation made by you; if I do this, I shall be your good
brother and colleague, and a most eloquent person, and your friend and
companion; and, what is still more, you will pronounce all the
translations I have made from Origen to be orthodox. But, if I utter a
word or move a step, I shall at once be unsound and a heretic, and
unworthy of all connexion with you. This is the way you trumpet forth
my praises, this is the way you exhort me to peace. You do not grant me
liberty for a groan or a tear in my grief.