When my prayers are a burden and task,
No wonder I little receive;
O LORD, make me willing to ask,
Since thou art so ready to give
Although I am bought with thy blood,
And all thy salvation is mine;
At a distance from thee my chief good,
I wander, and languish, and pine.
Of thy goodness of old when I read,
To those who were sinners like me,
Why may I not wrestle and plead,
With them a partaker to be?
Thine arm is not shortened since then,
And those who believe in thy name,
Ever find thou art Yea, and Amen,
Through all generations the same.
While my spirit within me is pressed
With sorrow, temptation, and fear;
Like John I would flee to thy breast,
And pour my complaints in thine ear:
How happy and favored was he,
Who could on thy bosom repose!
Might this favor be granted to me,
I’d smile at the rage of my foes.
I have heard of thy wonderful name,
How great and exalted thou art;
But ah! I confess to my shame,
It faintly impresses my heart:
The beams of thy glory display,
As PETER once saw thee appear;
That transported like him I may say,
“It is good for my soul to be here.”
What a sorrow and weight didst thou feel,
When nailed, for my sake, to the tree!
My heart sure is harder than steel,
To feel no more sorrow for thee:
Oh let me with THOMAS descry
The wounds in thy hands and thy side;
And have feelings like his, when I cry,
“My GOD and my Savior has died!”
But if thou hast appointed me still
To wrestle, and suffer, and fight;
Oh make me resigned to thy will,
For all thine appointments are right:
This mercy, at least, I entreat,
That knowing how vile I have been,
I with MARY may wait at thy feet,
And weep o’er the pardon of sin.